


The three caballeros plus one annoyance ride again

by Lieju



Category: Disney Duck Universe, Legend of the Three Caballeros (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-01-14
Packaged: 2019-10-09 23:02:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17414195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lieju/pseuds/Lieju
Summary: So basically I wanted to write this certain specific ship and ended up writing a Legend of the three caballeros fic.Pairings: You can't prove this isn't canon





	The three caballeros plus one annoyance ride again

 

“Here, you see!” Xandra looked like she had to resist the urge to jump up and down like an excited puppy. “Finally, we have reached the peak of Mount Olympos, the land of the Gods! Or to be exact a kinda conference centre for gods these days.”

“Impressive,” José nodded approvingly.

“Cool,” Donald said. He decided to add a one or two impressed 'aahs' just in case.

“I have never seen anything quite like this!” Panchito exclaimed.

The three caballeros stared at the almost empty plateau. Empty except for a big but otherwise unimpressive rock and a tiny shack next to it. The rock wasn't even a nice colour. The paintjob on the shack had seen better days.

A tumbleweed had the good sense and the comedic timing to roll by. It hit the shack. The shack collapsed.

José reached to whisper the other two: “It's not that impressive, right?”

“Let her have her fun,” Panchito said. He clapped a few more times for emphasis.

“I think she was stuck in the book a few millenia too long,” Donald mumbled.

“Oh, sorry,” Xandra said. “I forgot it's shielded from mortal eyes. By the way you guys are super easily impressed. Just let me drop the illusion...”

She snapped her fingers and suddenly the group was surrounded by a party of godlike-beings similar to their guide.

“AAH!!!”

“Yeah isn't it great?” Xandra said. She waved at the gods and mythical creatures who were drinking and playing petanque. “We'll get the help we need and- OH! Look!!! It's Odin! Hey how's it hanging?”

The one-eyed god gave her a nod and returned to refilling the punch bowl.

Xandra grasped her hands. “It's been so long! I can't wait to see all of my friends and-”

She was interrupted by a voice that sounded like the jingle of a thousand silver bells in the spring breeze. “Xaaandra my dear~!”

Donald watched Xandra visibly tense.

She turned towards the voice, the widest fake smile on her face. “Ooooh hello. It's been a _whiiile_.”

She pushed the three birds to the forefront. “I didn't expect to see you here at all! What a coincidence! Have you met the three caballeros?” She straightened Donald's hat. “My champions. Gonna save the world. No biggie.”

She poked José's back. “Try to stand a bit straighter,” she whispered.

“What's with her all of a sudden?” Donald asked.

He narrowed his eyes. The tall woman with golden curls seemed to shine almost... She was certainly beautiful but Donald couldn't help feel distrust towards the figure. Almost like she had wronged him in the past. Did he _know_ her..?

José put a hand on his shoulder. “My dear Donald, it's really quite clear for one who understands the heart of a woman.”

Panchito set his hand on Donald's other shoulder. “It really is, amigo.”

The lady gave them a look. “How cute. New pets of yours? Oh no sorry I realize I misunderstood.”

She batted her eyelashes at Xandra. “You finally found yourself in a company of equals. Good for you. You can find someone very lovely and backstab her ruthlessly.”

Donald gasped as he noticed the blindfold hanging around her neck. “Could it be..?”

José nodded. “Exactly, clear as day.”

Panchito joined in. “They used to run a clown school together.”

“Exactly, they-” José shook his head. “Wait what. NO! Obviously they used to date!”

Xandra leaned in close to the other woman. “Hahaha! I am doing very well and don't need you at all! I'm happy and an independent goddess that's me!”

Panchito shrugged. “These sort of things can be very emotional. Poor ladies, forced to abandon their dreams of bringing joy to children everywhere...”

The golden-haired woman put her hands on her hips. “That's not what you said when you walked out on me! The nerve! After the greatest betrayal known to man!”

“That's not how I remember it! And you were always a lousy kisser! Who'd be crying after you and drowning her sorrows in chocolate because she will never get her dream wedding!?”

“You never call! Did our love mean nothing to you?”

“I WAS TRAPPED IN A BOOK!”

José and Donald turned to look at Panchito.

He shrugged. “What? I never said they weren't also exes. Take it from me, it's always best to not mix romance and the attempts at clown schooling reformation. Very messy. Custard pies everywhere.”

“Anyway!” Xandra exclaimed. “I am very busy with my current project of _saving the world_.” She only now seemed to notice the way the three caballeros were looking at her. “This is Lady Luck. Fortuna. A layabout extraordinaire.”

Fortuna moved her perfect brow into a frown. “Says someone who just took a holiday for a week? Thousand years?”

“Hello? A magical book? Being imprisoned?”

“Like that time you were eaten by a Hydra and couldn't make it to our anniversary?” Fortuna mumbled. “Or the time you had to leave my birthday party early to go clean some stables? Left me in a rain all by myself to go girdle-shopping?”

Xandra ignored her, pulled out her spear and stroke a pose. “But now I have returned and have found my champions. What have _you_ been doing?”

“Sharing joy and sorrow, bringing down empires, keeping things interesting, you know. The usual.” Fortuna waved her hand. “Well _I_ got a champion too!”

An explosion of golden sparkles and four leaf glovers appeared, and in the midst of it-

“Oh no,” Donald said. “Not him.”

“Oh hi cuz.”

“Do you know this strange goose, Donald?” José asked.

“Yeah, he's my cousin. Ugh...”

The goose, dressed in the golden toga walked to the three caballeros. “Gladstone Gander,” he poked Donald's bill. “At your service.”

Fortuna hurried to him. “Oh nono, my little baby boy don't touch the common rabble.”

She pulled Gladstone away and handed him a hand-wipe. “I don't think bad dressing sense and overall aura of failure is infectious but no harm being too careful.”

Gladstone wiped his hand and dropped the wipe on the floor.

“Hey! Littering!” Donald pointed at it.

Fortuna ruffled Gladstone's hair. “Aww, but he looked so stylish and cute doing it.”

“He is right,” José said. “If I had any money I'd give it to him just because he deserves it for brightening our day. Truly, I have never seen anyone litter in a way that justifies the very action through the inherent beauty involved.”

Panchito pulled out a half-eaten chocolate bar from his pocket. “Here, have this.” He reached out his hand. “I have been saving it for the celebration for when we save the world but you deserve it more.”

Gladstone made a face. “I don't want it. Eww, it's half-eaten.”

Panchito's face fell. “Aw.”

“Just one champion?” Xandra laughed. “He will bring the terrible Lord Felldrake down in a fight to the death?”

Gladstone yawned. “Sounds like too much work.”

“Yes he will!” Fortuna exclaimed.

“Oh yeah?” Xandra pushed close enough for their noses to touch. “That a promise?”

“Yes!”

“The same kinda promise you made when you told me you'd water my favourite potted plant when I was away fighting the _Jörmungandr_?”

“I did water it!”

“Your pet rabbit ate it!”

“And got stomach pains! You ruthless beast!”

Fortuna crossed her arms. “Come! My champion! We are obviously not wanted here! I know _sooo_ many better parties!”

Gladstone waved goodbye. “See ya-”

They disappeared in an angry explosion of diamonds and horseshoes. One horseshoe hit Donald in the face.

“WAK!”

Xandra shook her fist at the spot they had stood in a few seconds ago before turning to the three birds.

“From now on we'll train every day! To beat her and her goofy little stink goose!”

“And save the world, right?” José said.

“What? Yes, of course.”

Xandra pulled Donald up. “Come on, we can't let people see you like this.”

The little squabble hadn't drawn any attention from the partying gods. Almost like they were very used to things like that.

“Do you think you could wear a wig?” Xandra asked. “A very shiny wig?”

Donald let out a groan.

 


End file.
